What a fucking waste of an outfit
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize