I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
