I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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