Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
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