After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
