So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
