Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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