So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
