: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
