She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize
