I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
