Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Randomize
