Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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