If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize