dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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