just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
