She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
be right there i have to get my cape
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
