hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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