At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
