also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
