Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
