do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
