At least make sure they are 18
Why
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
