a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
