Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Idk if I want to put a bra on
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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