Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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