hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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