Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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