Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
