got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
