we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize