i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Randomize
