It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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