that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
