I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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