sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
one might say we're banned from that church
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
