so explain again why im purple
no
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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