I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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