Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize