Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
