I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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