Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
