if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
