butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Randomize
