so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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