i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Randomize
