...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
