If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
