I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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