You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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