You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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