There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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